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Men are like a fine wine. They start out as grapes, and it's up to women to stomp the shit out of them until they turn into something acceptable to have dinner with.
Some people say that I must be a horrible person. That's not true. I have the heart of a young boy ... on my desk.
The only thing wrong with a perfect drive to work, is that you end up at work.
A boy becomes a man when the marks he wants to leave on the world have nothing to do with tires.
Why do they call it a TV set when you only get one?
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