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Found 39 one-liners matching beer

	I drink beer to celebrate major events, such as the fall of communism, or the fact that our refrigerator is still working.
	I have spent most of my money on women and beer. The rest I just wasted...
	I think that women should put pictures of missing husbands on beer cans.
	I was at a bar nursing a beer. My nipple was getting quite soggy.
	I'd be rich if I could invent a pop-top beer can that wives can't hear open.
	I've heard about the evils of drinking beer, so I gave up reading.
	If God had intended us to drink beer, He would have given us stomachs.
	If you ever reach total enlightenment while you're drinking a beer, I bet it makes beer shoot out your nose.
	In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is freedom, in water there is bacteria.
	Men are simple things. They can survive a whole weekend with only three things: beer, boxer shorts and batteries for the remote control.
	Okay, brain. You don't like me, and I don't like you, but let's get through this thing and then I can continue killing you with beer.
	On the first day of Christmas, my true love gave to me: a beer ... in a tree.
	People who drink light "beer" don't like the taste of beer; they just like to pee alot.
	Sometimes when I reflect back on all the beer I drink I feel shamed. Then I look into the glass and think about the workers in the brewery and all of their hopes and dreams. If I didn't drink this beer, they might be out of work and their dreams would be shattered. Then I say to myself, "It is better that I drink this beer and let their dreams come true than be selfish and worry about my liver.
	They who drink beer will think beer.
	Without question, the greatest invention in the history of mankind is beer. Oh, I grant you that the wheel was also a fine invention, but the wheel does not go nearly as well with pizza.
	Women should put pictures of missing husbands on beer cans.
	Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are sexy.
	Women. You can't live with them. Pass the beer nuts.

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