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A bachelor is a selfish, undeserving guy who has cheated some woman out of a divorce.
 
A lawyer is never entirely comfortable with a friendly divorce, anymore than a good mortician wants to finish his job and then have the patient sit up on the table.
 
A woman voting for divorce is like a turkey voting for Christmas.
 
Americans divorce so much we are called the land of the free, and we get married so often that we are called home of the brave.
 
Being divorced is like being hit by a Mack truck. If you live through it, you start looking very carefully to the right and to the left.
 
Cannibals won't eat divorced women...they're very bitter.
 
Divorce - from the Latin word meaning to rip out a man's genitals through his wallet.
 
Divorce is like Espresso, expensive and bitter.
 
For some reason, we see divorce as a signal of failure, despite the fact that each of us has a right, and an obligation, to rectify any other mistake we make in life.
 
I guess the only way to stop divorce is to stop marriage.
 
I had a really good childhood up until I was nine. Then a classic case of divorce really affected me.
 
I'm a great housekeeper. I get divorced. I keep the house.
 
In our family we don't divorce our men, we bury them.
 
It is a sad fact that 50 percent of marriages in this country end in divorce. But hey, the other half end in death. You could be one of the lucky ones!
 
Love is the quest, marriage the conquest and divorce... the inquest.
 
Marriage is grand... divorce is about 10 grand.
 
Marriage is one of the chief causes of divorce.
 
Marriage still confers one very special privilege....Only a married person can get divorced.
 
My divorce came to me as a complete surprise. That's what happens when you haven't been home in eighteen years.
 
My husband and I divorced over religious differences. He thought he was God and I didn't.
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