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A good marriage is like a casserole: only those involved actually know what goes into it.
 
A good marriage would be between a blind wife and a deaf husband.
 
A successful marriage isn't finding the right person - it's being the right person.
 
A truly perfect marriage would be one between a blind woman and a deaf man.
 
Adam and Eve had an ideal marriage. He didn't have to hear about all the men she could have married, and she didn't have to hear about the way his mother cooked.
 
Alcohol is a perfect solvent: It dissolves marriages, families and careers.
 
All marriages are happy...it's the living together afterward that causes all the problems.
 
All tragedies are finished by a death, all comedies by a marriage.
 
Before marriage, a man will lie awake all night thinking about something you said; After marriage, he'll fall asleep before you finish saying it.
 
Before marriage, a man yearns for the woman he loves. After marriage, the 'Y' becomes silent.
 
Can someone tell me where on my marriage license I can find the expiration date ?
 
Even though a marriage is made in heaven, the maintenance work has to be done here on earth!
 
Every time I try to make my marriage more exciting,my wife finds out about it right away.
 
I guess the only way to stop divorce is to stop marriage.
 
I responded to my girlfriend's marriage proposal by saying, "You're What?!"
 
I think men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage. They've experienced pain and bought jewelry.
 
I'm the only man in the world with a marriage licence made out to whom it may concern.
 
If marriage were outlawed, only outlaws would have inlaws.
 
If variety is the spice of life, marriage is the big can of leftover Spam.
 
If you want to read about love and marriage, you've got to buy two separate books.
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